3-D

Well hello my little gummy-bears. Has it really been 8 days since i posted? It appears so!

Where have i been?

What have i been doing?

Who have i been 'doing'?

If anyone knows the answers to these questions, please let me know and i promise to take notes.

In more pressing matters, a movie named Beowulf was recently released in multiplexatoriums around the UK. Despite being full of semi-clad men and monsters, the entire film appears to be too stunning to be able to avert your gaze from...annnnnd it's in 3-D!!

Every film would benefit from being in 3-D and below I've listed just a few examples of how this would enhance the cinematic experience of even the dreariest movies:

The Care Bears Movie would come to life in whole new ways as their rainbows burst from their chests in full 3-D as the audience ducks for cover and just imagine the little dance numbers! Tiny furry folks all waltzing and shuffling around your brain! It would be more awesome that the time i was left unattended in the otter sanctuary for a whole 23 minutes.

Free Willy would simply make you squeal with excitement like an over-tickled basket of kittens as Willy leaps towards you, the salty spray appearing to cover the audience before willy goes deep..but not before spurting liquid from his spurty-hole!

Hardcore Porn - see above.

It's time we took a stance and DEMANDED that Hollywood makes every film this way! If they refuse, we should stamp our feet/flippers/hooves and threaten to hold our breath until we die!