10 things that you might not wish to say when picking up your valentine date:
What, you're wearing THAT?
Maybe i should go alone...
Have you gained weight recently?
Come on dragon face, let's roll.
I've got my granny and three of her bingo-friends in the car. You don't mind if they join us, right?
I think you should get a blood test....
Have you always had that mole???
Let's get this over with.
What? The yellow spot thing? Well the puss has stopped seeping now so i think we're good for another hour before it flames up again.
I hope you brought cash cos i'm hungry...