Mr Men

Some of the best stories for children somehow seem out of date in the ever-changing world of today. Roger Hargreaves' Mr Men books are a prime example. If they were written today they'd have to be updated. To help Roger out, I've started off with a few ideas...

Mr Tickle: Once again Mr Tickles amazingly long arms have landed him in trouble. This time, a slight altercation near the ladies changing rooms in a department store have ensured him a restraining order from Little Miss Chatterbox after she blabbed to the police about where she found his hands.

Mr Bump: Accident prone or simply a workshy layabout claiming disability grants from the government? Only Mr Nosey knows for sure as a keen government agent ready to prove that Mr Bump can lift his litter bins unaided.

Mr Greedy: Obesity is no joke, kids. In this touching tale, we discover exactly why Mr Greedy can't stop eating and also why he spends his waking hours watching repeats of Jeremy Kyle Shows and cries into his pillow every evening.

Mr Impossible: Solves every problem in the Middle East using just a Curly Wurly and a packet of Chewits.

Mr Sneeze: Every day is fun fun fun for Mr Sneeze. Hilarity ensues as he sneezes at inappropriate moments throughout the day. However, his joy turns to tears when he discovers that his sneezing is a symptom of AIDS. The bad AIDS too! (He also doesn't appear to have any arms. You're a sick, sick man Mr Hargreaves).