Bumble Bees

Jumper wearing bullies of the insect world or simply misunderstood fluffy little miniature bear-cubs with gossamer wings and happy honey purses?

According to scientists, bumble-bees should not be able to fly. It confounds them. The body weight to wing fluttery speed lift off potential something-or-other is all out of whack.

However, i CAN confirm that these darlings of the flowerbed neighborhood are,in fact, powered not by their beautifully constructed wingloids but by tiny motor boat engines concealed neatly beneath their fluffy yellow and black stripey sweaters.

Because insects get up really early in the morning (in order to get all their tasks done before Jeremy Kyle starts at 9.25), no 'human beans' are around to see them frantically tugging their rip-cords to get the motors started each morning. The distinctive 'idle' put-put-put noise is a dead giveaway which is why you rarely see them ever stopping for a rest or taking a stroll.

After Jeremy Kyle has finished, all the bees get naked and have a huge bee orgy in the honey they've collected while their jumpers spin around and around in the hive washing-machine (on a low temperature, obviously).

Wasps, on the other hand, are just gits.