Since it would appear that most of the months of the year are named after gods, i decided to pop the words "may" and "gods" into the Dolphin-O-Type-2000's searchy box.
The results did not disappoint and it soon became apparent that May is also named after a god too...and his first name is Brian!
Now, i was taken aback by this fact until i had it confirmed by another quick search which concluded that "Brian" is also the name of the son of God. It all makes sense now.
So, what else have i discovered about this God of Rock? Well, here were the top factoids which should probably be written down and kept in a safe place or tattooed on your head for easy access. There might be a quiz later.
Brian May apparently was not born, but composed in the back room of Richer Sounds' Hi-Fi Emporium (Jerusalem Branch) in 371 BC.
Over 32 types of woodland creature can be found in his hair and Brian has to lay traps to stop Bill Oddie from moving a documentary crew in while he sleeps.
Brian can play every note from A to G and also K and Q which can only be heard by penguins.
Brian asks every Speaker manufacturer to remove the "11" setting. Brian can only play up to "4" without making everyone on Earth's eyeballs explode with pleasure.
People think that Brian wears clogs on stage because he's eccentric but the real deal is that Brian has to "earth" himself as much as possible. If he wore normal shoes, his fingers would generate enough electricity to destroy the first three rows of the audience.
When calendars were being put together, the fifth month was going to be called "Brian" but it soon became apparent that people might get confused and think it was named after Brian Blessed.
Brian refuses to play Guitar Hero on the PlayStation as he generally melts the controller after one chord, causes power blackouts in the same postcode area and makes all your other video games cry with envy and throw themselves into mouse-traps.
It is NOT true that Freddy Mercury named the planet Mercury. That would be simply ridiculous.
7 comments:
smy you sometimes witter on about such rubbish, i'm sure you could have found something more interesting to talk about on here, like may pole-dancing which (i've heard) involves human females stripping and generally flashing their bodies at men who are often old enough to be the great great great grandad
also i heard a rumour that your actual name is rob, could you confirm or deny this?
That's a complete lie fabricated by slightly aggreived weasels.
My name is Smylexx of the family Smylexxia Smylexxius.
"Rob's Mysterious Fishtank" doesn't really have the same ring to it, does it?
What a shocking accusation my flippered friend!
Can Maverick confirm or deny that he is in fact, a chocolate bar?
No i am not a chocolate bar although i do quite enjoy eating them, but then again they do say u are what u eat which would mean i am a chocolate bar and smy is a fish
A FISH??? A flippin' Fish?
I am a dolphin!! A mammal...a porpoise with a purpose!!
How very DARE you!
Let me get something sorted in my head are u a dolphin or a porpoise, not sure then look in a mirror and now the following:
The common harbor porpoise has an abrupt snout, pointed teeth and a triangular thoracic fin.
While the bottlenose dolphin, or Tursiops truncates, has an elongated beak, round cone shaped teeth and a serrated dorsal appendage.
I'm sure you already knew that. That's what turns me on about 'cha, your attention to detail.
My teeth are small and rounded but don't let that fool you. I can give a really nasty nibble...or at the very least, a rather painful sucking!
Common Harbour Porpoise?
I'm not even slightly common. I even wash my soap...with other soaps...which i then wash...
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