Yesterday, while chasing a small pink salmon around the deep-end of my pool, i came accross a small treasure chest. Having spent 23 minutes poking it with my beak, i finally managed to open it and found, to my surprise, a family of crabs.
The oldest crab, Daddy Crab, was called Simon and he introduced me to his lovely wife Margaret and his two children Tarquin and Pandora. They waved a friendly claw at me and asked me if i liked playing games.
Since my beachball was currently being repaired (i had a psychotic hissy-fit a few days ago when i was offered a frozen cod fillet and popped my beachball as a way of displaying my displeasure to my human captors), I decided to play with the little crabs.
The game was simple. I had to copy everything the little crabs did. They'd move to the left and I'd move to the left, they'd wink and so would i. Everything was going swimmingly until they all started scratching their shells. With my little flippers, i was unable to copy the crabs and so, in order to win, i simply ate the kids and dropped a big pebble on the treasure chest.
Have you ever had a case of crabs that made you scratch? Were they as irritating as the ones i had to put up with? How did you get rid of them?
5 comments:
All i can say to your your case of crabs is you need to take more care with your personal hygine !!
and what were you doing for 23 mins that is where i think you went wrong
Smy please take more care went you poke unknown boxes and you wont end up with unwanted crabs
M-m-m-my personal hygiene?? My pool has a lovely big filter on it and i rub myself with sponges every day but erm.. let's not discuss that.
bwaha! Well, since you ask..
Well, as you might know, my eyesight is really poor, and when I go swimming in the sea I usually do it without glasses on, and in the particalr case also without lenses.
There is this nice spot at the very deep end of the pier where you can dive underwater and find pretty shells and little fish-bones and other kinds of fantastic little treasures.
So it happened that I was swimming around, blowing bubbles into the green-bluish wonderfulness - seeing absolutely nothing, when I noticed a shell on the bottom.
I immediately kicked down to the bottom and picked it up with two fingers and swam back up to the sunny surface.
So, seeing my eyesight is so horrible - I have to stick things really close up in my face to see it clearly. So I held the shell like a thumb away from my blue, malfunctioning eyeballs when I noticed to my own displeasure
that it was a crab.
And it was looking at me with little, pointy eyes, clicking its claws absent-mindedly.
Seeing I was quite surprised having *snippety-snap* so close to my eye, I don't find it strange that I let out a little shriek and threw it remarkably far.
Well, could be it wasn't all that far, but how would I know - I can't see shit.
Oh, and I was wondering... Do dolphins even eat crabs? I didn't know that.
Well, it's a bit like an Oreo Cookie. You sort of suck out the soft creamy centre and throw the hard bits away.
If you're skilled, you can use the hard bits as a nice ash-tray or soap-dish afterwards.
Crabs are lovely, I agree.
But I prefer shrimp to be honest!
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